Inside me was a small dark space;
an empty space, a hollow place,
a place where love and light might be
but only ever in short bursts
had true love captivated me.
I called to you for many years.
I didn’t think you’d really come
but then you answered, and you were
the same shape as my missing piece,
compelling me to place you there.
You fitted, and you gripped me hard,
you gave me what I did not have;
you loved me and you needed me.
With wonderment and desperate joy
we shared exquisite chemistry.
You wove your love around my heart,
and magic from your eyes and lips
and touch and words did pierce me deep,
transfixed me with such gentleness
and open, simple honesty.
My small, dark space, now full with dreams,
had burst its banks and overflowed
with passion, love and guileless trust.
That empty space, which was once small;
that space was now the size of us.
We merged a while, we thought as one,
we spoke as one, we walked as one.
You were my mind, the centre of
my heart, my life, my waking dreams,
until the day you flew, my love.
The day that you withdrew, my love,
and took your dazzling light with you.
My world fell dark, all colour drained,
you crushed me with your parting words,
my heart stopped still, my soul in flames.
My small dark space is now a gulf,
far larger, overwhelmingly
a place of ice, no feeling there.
A huge, dark space of aching loss.
No light, no love, just cold despair.
And deep inside this empty void
it’s possible to just make out
a fleeting movement, hard to see.
A shadow flickers, faint and low,
a small, dark shape which once was me.
19 May 2017